Our PM Najib has just announced that the government will inject RM20 billion (S$6.6 billion) into a state equity investment firm to shore up the stock market ( here ). As a result, the FBMKLCI is now up 21 points (as at 2:50pm). The good news is that when you let go and float with the tide, you’re likely to bump into a rare fish with two heads that winks at you. The bad news is that bouncing around in a boat makes you nauseous, gives you a headache, and leaves you feeling a tad blue. The good news is that there is a full moon in April which is great if you’re in the mood for making love to moonbeams, playing peek-a-boo among the stars because that’s as close as you’ll get to an intimate encounter! Make sure you stock your goody bag with your favorite melt-in-your-mouth liqueur-flavored chocolates!
The good news is that you don’t like being in the limelight, enjoy your own company for hours on end, and adore inventing invisible playmates who never give you any grief. The good news is that the ants won’t even try to poke a hole in your dam…the bad news is that they may eat you out of house and home! The good news is that Mars will power up your DNA – Domestic Nuisance Amusements quotient.
The bad news is that members of the Grand Cabal of Able-Bodied Sedentarians won’t have much time for rest, relaxation or catnaps. The good news is that you’ll have abundant energy to devote to the Knights-Champions of the Domestic Dog, the Ancient Order of Modern Troglodytes, and the Mysterious Order of the Undecipherable Scroll. There is one piece of positive news, the Hingefreel people of Arkintoofle Mino,r (whose spaceships are powered by bad news), invite you to drop by and share any bits of glop and glum you’ve got! Best advice this month: lift lots of weights (which is nifty news for delightful dumbbells like you)!
The good news is that this month, like Greta, you’ll be taking long walks through the streets of some big city, dressed casually and wearing large sunglasses doing who knows what. The bad news is that you’ll be hounded not by the papparazzi but by a man in blue issuing you a summons for jay-walking. The good news is that you have a lot in common with Michelangelo, the 16th century Italian Renaissance painter, sculptor, architect, poet, and engineer. The bad news is that you’re a fish out of water when it comes to art, (unless of course you count doodling or painting by numbers as art).
The good news is that the owner of the vacuum is a politician who adores making long-winded speeches, and you’ll be sitting with a numb bum for five hours wondering when it will all end. The bad news is that more than a few of them have rather large bunions on them, while the remainder have no toes…just web feet. Students in investment clubs and stock market simulations use real-time stats to track their stock earnings.